How to Stop Overthinking and Anxiety
If you have been searching Google for how to stop overthinking and anxiety, this is for you.
A lot of the shit you see on Google about stopping overthinking and anxiety is a load of bollocks.
There. I said it.
Because most of it does not actually stop overthinking.
And it does not stop anxiety.
If it did, it would not still be a problem for you, would it?
Most Techniques Give You a Breather. They Do Not Fix the Problem.
Breathing exercises.
Box breathing.
The 5-4-3-2-1 method.
Name it to tame it.
Grounding exercises.
Nice techniques.
And for some people, they can give you a temporary breather.
If you are carrying a bit of stress, slowing your breathing or focusing on what is around you might help you feel better in that moment.
But feeling better for five minutes does not mean the thing making you anxious has gone away.
The bill is still there.
The relationship problem is still there.
The pressure at work is still there.
The argument with your child is still there.
The thing keeping you awake at night is still there.
You have just had a break from thinking about it.
That is not the same as fixing it.
When Calming Techniques Make You Overthink Even More
For someone carrying a lot of stress, some of these techniques may barely touch the sides.
And when they do not work, something else can happen.
You start worrying about why they are not working.
Why don't breathing exercises work for me?
Am I doing it wrong?
Why does everyone else say this helps?
Is there something wrong with me?
Should I be worried that I cannot calm myself down?
And there you go.
You have now got another thing to overthink.
You started with anxiety.
You tried to calm it.
The technique did not work.
Now you are anxious about why the anxiety technique did not work.
That is not particularly helpful, is it?
And Then There Is the Worry Window
One of the strangest pieces of advice I have seen is to schedule a worry window.
What?
A worry window?
So now apparently you need to book an appointment with your own anxiety.
Tuesday, 7:30pm.
Right then. Time to worry.
I understand the idea behind it. The aim is to stop worry taking over your whole day by giving it a set time.
But if you are already heavily overwhelmed, your brain does not always politely wait until 7:30pm because you told it to.
The goal is not to become better at scheduling your worry.
The goal is to deal with what is creating so much worry in the first place.
So How Do You Actually Stop Overthinking and Anxiety?
The first realistic step is to deal with the stress and pressure underneath it.
That might not be the answer you wanted.
It is probably easier to hear:
Take three deep breaths.
Write five things down.
Go for a walk.
Distract yourself.
But if the same pressures are waiting for you when you come back, your brain is likely to start going again.
If you are not prepared to look at what is actually putting you under pressure and start dealing with it, you may keep going around the same loop.
Overthinking.
Anxiety.
Temporary relief.
Overthinking again.
Stop Trying to Fix Everything at Once
This is where people often get stuck.
Your brain is already jumbled.
You have got a zillion things flying around your head.
Money.
Kids.
Work.
Relationships.
Family.
Things you should have done.
Things you need to do.
Things that might happen.
Things that probably will not happen but your brain has decided to investigate anyway.
And now somebody tells you to deal with your stress.
Great.
Where the hell do you start?
You start with one thing.
Not your whole life.
Not every problem.
Not everything that has happened in the last ten years.
One thing.
Find the pressure that is taking up the most space in your head and start there.
Then move to the next one.
You Need a Starting Point
You are not going to untangle everything while your brain is trying to solve 1,000 things at once.
You need to get your foot onto the first rung of the ladder.
That is why I created the Where Do I Start? quiz.
It helps you look at what is actually taking up the most space in your head and gives you somewhere to begin.
Take the quiz below.
Then stop trying to fix everything at once.
**Find the first thing.
Deal with that.
Then take the next step.**
Frequently Asked Questions
How do I stop overthinking and anxiety?
Start by looking at what is actually putting you under pressure.
Overthinking and anxiety often keep going because your brain is trying to deal with too much at once.
Instead of trying to switch your thoughts off, work out what needs your attention first.
Why can't I stop overthinking?
Because your brain may still be trying to solve something.
Telling yourself to stop thinking does not remove the problem, pressure or uncertainty underneath it.
Can stress cause overthinking and anxiety?
Yes.
When you are under a lot of stress, it can become harder to think clearly, make decisions and work out what needs dealing with first.
Your brain can end up jumping from one problem to another.
Why do breathing exercises not work for my anxiety?
Breathing exercises can help some people feel calmer for a short time.
But if you are carrying a lot of stress, they may not be enough on their own.
They do not remove the thing that is putting you under pressure.
Can breathing exercises make anxiety feel worse?
Sometimes.
If you expect a technique to work and it does not, you can start worrying about why it is not working.
That can give you even more to overthink.
Does the 5-4-3-2-1 method stop overthinking?
It can help bring your attention back to what is around you and give you a temporary break.
But it does not necessarily deal with the reason you were overthinking in the first place.
Why does my brain keep thinking about everything at once?
Because when you have several pressures at the same time, your brain can struggle to decide what needs your attention first.
Everything starts to feel urgent.
That is why finding one starting point can make such a difference.
What should I do when everything feels overwhelming?
Do not try to fix everything at once.
Start with one thing.
Work out which pressure is taking up the most space in your head and begin there.
Is overthinking a sign that something is wrong with me?
Not necessarily.
Overthinking can happen when you are stressed, uncertain, worried or trying to deal with too many things at the same time.
The important part is understanding what is driving it.
Where do I start if I don't know what is causing my stress?
Take the Where Do I Start? quiz can help you identify what needs your attention first.
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